April 27, 2011


One of the hardest things to cope with I have found as I have gotten older is changes in relationships. We all go through periods of time where we are closer with certain people then others and then it changes. Consider how who your best friends are have changed over the years. Chances are you have different best friends now then you did in college then you did in high school then you did when you were a kid. We all think we will be friends forever when we are young and the truth is as we get older, people and priorities change..people simply drift apart.

Every relationship takes an effort from both sides. If one person is willing to make the effort and the other is not, that is the end of the relationship whether we like it or not. This is true with friends, family and romantic relationships. It's a two person effort, always. I believe each relationship we have in our lives is meant to teach us something, therefore, no relationship is ever a waste. Even when people hurt us, we benefit. We learn from each other. In every healthy relationship we laugh, we cry, we have fun, we fight, forgive and move on, sometimes together and sometimes not.

My mom broke it down for me the other night at dinner. She explains that we have three types of friends; A, B and C. We usually like our friends for different reasons, for what they bring to our lives that is unique to them. Some we always have a great time with, some friends are great to talk to, some we can live with, travel with, some give great advice, some tell us how it is etc.. Our 'A' friends are kind of the whole package. They are our best friends. The people we count on and have that unconditional bond with. Our 'B' friends are people that we have fun with, we grab dinner once and a while with, basically an A friend with out the unconditional, sisterly bond. A little more casual. Our 'C' friends are people we simply have a good time with here and there. They really aren't involoved in our lives in any other way. You will find that throughout your life some friends may drift through the different categories, being closer to you at certain points of your life then others... some are consistently 'A' friends. If you have even one 'A' friend you should consider yourself very lucky. Treasure them.

Remember to always make the effort with those you care about and tell people in your life how you feel about them. After all, life is too short and our relationships are what make it worthwhile.

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